Milk & Satire

Sign of the times in an article at nypost.com, edited by yours truly: Borden has filed for bankruptcy protection, the second major U.S. dairy to do so in as many months. The amount of milk consumed per capita in America has tumbled more than 40% since 1975. 2730 dairy farms have gone out of business in the last 18 months. American refrigerators are increasingly stocked with juice, soda and milk substitutes made from soy or almonds. Protein bars, yogurts and other on-the-go breakfasts have replaced a morning bowl of cereal. I may soon have to go to soy milk for my daily bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios and cereal snacks at night. I tried it years ago. It was fine. I may have given it up because a comedian, I think it was Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm, said he’d read soy shrinks the brain. Geez, will milk be done in by the creative destruction of capitalism? Hard to believe.

This headline from foxnews.com might not say it all, but it says a lot: “Stampede during Soleimani’s funeral procession kills at least 32.”

From FN, edited by yt: The Babylon Bee is considered a conservative version of The Onion. A CNN “reporter’s” reaction to a recent faux headline incited a firestorm on social media. He worries that people may take the statement literally. He has never shown such concern about any of The Onion’s work, which he has praised in several posts. Here’s the headline in question: “Democrats Call For Flags To Be Flown At Half-Mast to Grieve Death of Soleimani.” In a lampoon of the current tiff, TBB reposted a headline from 2017: “CNN To Launch Real News Spinoff Site.” Kudos.

And granting equal time, here’s a headline from The Onion:

Since the NHL expanded to so many teams, 80% of the schedule has the feel of exhibition games. The real season doesn’t seem to kick in until March. Yesterday the Nashville Predators fired head coach Peter Laviolette in a case of what seems “What have you done for me lately?” Under his five-and-a-half years of guidance, the team was 248–143–60, won two division titles and advanced to a Stanley Cup final. This year it sits four points out of a playoff spot, which anyone who follows the sport knows is nothing at this stage. He won a Stanley Cup as coach of the Carolina Hurricanes in 2003. His overall record in 18 years at the helm of four franchises is 451–248–143. Sometimes pro sports is silly. Since the unexpected seems to occur in hockey more than any other sport, who would be surprised if the Predators won the Cup?

With the hiring of Mike McCarthy, who won a Super Bowl in Green Bay, we will find out if the Cowboys’ talent has been over-rated all along.

No luck selling books on the street today. Back at ’em manana.

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